Noteworthy Narratives

For the last couple of weeks we worked on writing personal narratives in class.  I was so amazed with the students’ creativity. I could not decide which ones to highlight on my blog, so  I actually had to draw names for the first time.  Take a look at a few below, but please be sure to look at all the other stories written by the middle schoolers.  I posted two per grade level.

Sixth Grade Story

Frightening Zip-lining by Ayden I
My family was going on their very first zip-lining trip. There was an over-all feeling of excitement, as if electricity was charging through the air. Everybody but me felt it. All I felt was foreboding.I didn’t know why I was so nervous. Everybody told me it was going to be fun. I guess hanging by a one inch thick wire that could snap and send me plummeting to my death at any second had something to do with it. I hadn’t actually been zip-lining before, only told about it.

I’m not one to share my feelings, so I didn’t expect any sympathy. We pulled into the gravel parking lot and climbed the wooden steps. I looked around and noticed everything from the porta-potties to the mud next to the stairs. We got to the top and entered the building. We were directed to a separate room and waited for what felt like forever, but was probably two minutes.

The instructors finally came in and helped us into giant harnesses that were supposed to hold us to the cable. We got into jeeps and rode up the mountain we would then be going down on via zip-lining. Everywhere I looked there were vibrant hues of green and brown.

We reached the end of our uphill drive and they instructed us to stand In a straight line. I was number seven. The instructors proceeded to tell us the dos and don’ts of zip-lining. They had us each do a practice run that was over solid ground.

I finished the practice run without any bumps. I knew the practice wasn’t an exact simulation so it did nothing to quell the rising fear I felt. The line slowly shortened until it was finally time. The moment I had been fearing had come. I was going zip-lining.

The instructor beckoned to me. I stepped up onto the platform and she hooked me up to the cable. “Don’t worry.” She said. She had probably seen my face.

“I’m ready.” I declared slowly. I was still debating whether or not I should chicken out, but before I could say anything I was pushed off the platform. I screamed so loud I thought my lungs were burning. My body was so tense I thought it would break at the slightest provocation. I was expecting to free-fall any second.

I relaxed slightly once I realized I wasn’t hurdling towards my death, but I was still wound up tighter than one of those toys you wind up using that key thingy. I got to the other platform and it was then that I realized I was screaming for joy. I wanted to go again.

“How was it?” That was my sister. She had gone right before me.

“Amazing,” I said. “Truly amazing.”

I hadn’t realized how much fun zip-lining was. The fear of the unknown was overpowering my curiosity and common sense. I couldn’t truly enjoy it until I didn’t have enough time to think about it. We went zip-lining and rappelling ten more times. Every time I couldn’t wait for my turn to go. Sadly, we finished two hours later. We zip-lined until we got back to the building. Looking back on it all, I laughed. I laughed at how I was afraid.

OMG NOOOOO!!!! by: Ariella

Oh my gosh!!!  My heart is racing!  This can’t be happening!  No, no, no, not today!  This can’t happen later next week!  No!  My big day is this weekend!  I have been preparing for this day my whole life.  My family and friends are all going to be there watching ME and only ME.  I can’t believe this is happening to me right now.  With that thought, I heard the doctor say,”You will have to get a cast.”

So you are probably wondering, what is going on?  I was having a great morning, who am I kidding; I was rushing out of the door for school.  The sun was shinning and I thought that this was going to be an amazing day!  I was way off.

Karate has always been something I enjoyed doing. I had been going to karate 2-3 times a week and I was testing for my black belt that Saturday.  I was so excited!  To me nothing could ruin that week, but little did I know, maybe something could.

Our instructors had always told us to keep our hands in a fist when we were fighting and I always did. But that time I guess that changed.

Everyday we did something different in karate but usually we always spared (fought).  These are just practice fights so we wear fighting gear to make sure we do not get hurt.  We were told do go to some part of the room and an instructor watched and made sure nothing crazy happens.

Then I was fighting a boy.  We were both doing great.  But all of a sudden he kicked and his foot moved my thumb maybe a little to far back.

“I can’t feel it!” I told my master.  I was panicking! What if my thumb was broken?  What if I could not test?  I wanted to cry!

“You are testing this weekend?” my Master asked.  I nodded.

My father showed up at that very moment.  We explained what was going on to him.  He took me home.  We iced my thumb and ate dinner with my mother and sisters.

“Are you still in pain?” questioned my mother.

I replied with,”Yes”.

My mother found out that Care Spot, a doctor’s office, was still open and took me there.  I prayed that it was not broken.  We waited and waited, and then they took us in.

They were not sure if it was fractured, so they gave me a foam cast.

The next morning my mom takes me to a hand orthopedic.  I was so scared.  They took x-rays and came back with news.

“Your thumb is fractured, you will have to get a cast,” announced the Doctor.

My mouth hung open in an O.  They took me into a room and started putting the cast on.  Although they were talking to me all I could here was this big crashing sound.

When we reached the car my mouth was still in an O.  I closed the car door and started bursting into tears.  My mom calmed me down a couple minutes later.

“They probably won’t let me test now!” I cried.

“Lets call them.” my mother replied.

My mother talked with someone from the karate school.  She hung up and turned to me with a smile.

“You can test, but you will have to spar with that hand behind your back!” my mother said with a smile.

I was speechless.  I couldn’t believe it.  We called my dad and told him the news.  He told me congratulations and we headed to school.

Then, before I knew it, it was my karate testing day. I had to be at there from 8:00 a.m. to  8:00 p.m.  My whole body shook as my dad drove me there.  He gave me a hug, wished me good luck, and I was off.

Then it’s 6:00 pm.  My family and friends were all there.  I hoped I’d do well.

We finally got our results, and I couldn’t believe it.  I passed!  I was so happy I that I was now a first dan black belt.  My family came to my house and we had pizza and cake.  There were balloons and flowers and a poster all for me.  I wanted to cry again but this time of happiness!

Even though I fractured my thumb, I still pushed my self and tested.  I never gave up!  I set a goal and I pushed it all the way through, even when something bad was going on.

Seventh Grade

Brace Face by: Zoe

It was a chilly January morning and I shivered slightly as I stepped out of my car into the cool, crisp morning air. As I walked in the orthodontist with my mother and sister, I didn’t know what to expect. I had thought that I might look similar to the dentists that I usually went to, but I was surprised to find that it was a lot smaller. We checked in quickly, then sat down in the front rom and waited for our turn. I wasn’t particularly worried. After all, I was only getting my teeth checked. At least, that’s what I thought.

I sat in the waiting room for around five minutes before I heard my name called. As I walked into another room with the orthodontists, I was told to take out my earrings. Then, an x-ray was done on my teeth. After having my teeth checked, I was told to get my mom. I waited as they conversed. They were talking abut my sister who was supposed to be getting braces that day. However, they wanted to wait a couple of weeks. The appointment was still open, though. So, they decided that I would be getting braces.

Once we decided that I would be getting braces, there were a couple of things to be done. I had to get a mold first. A big block of a substance slightly hard went into my mouth. I had to bite down so they could make sure that the braces were the exact shape of my teeth. Because it was very big, I began gagging. When that was done, it was time to get the actual brackets on. A couple of different things went into my mouth. They all held it open so the orthodontist could put the brackets on. It was extremely uncomfortable as they were pushing into my gum. I have no idea how long that part took, but I’m guessing that it was around twenty minutes. While that was in my mouth, the orthodontist began putting on the brackets. Finally, all of my teeth had braces on them.

I rinsed out my mouth in the sink, trying to get rid of the horrible taste inside it. It tasted like gasoline. I walked over to the mirror, eager to see my braces. I looked at the reflection of myself in the mirror and was astounded. It was shocking to see how different my teeth looked with braces on them. Then, I got to choose the color of my rubber bands. There were surprisingly many options. There were around two shades for every color. Eventually, I decided on turquoise, because turquoise is one of my favorite colors. And although I could feel my teeth beginning to ache, I was very glad that I had finally gotten braces because they will make my teeth straight.

I didn’t know I would die that day. Well…that would because technically I kind of…um didn’t. In fact I am 101% alive today. I mean I guess you could say that I gained awareness that day. The only thing I lost that day was some skin on my foot, although I narrowly dodged a suspension. Before I explain what the heck I am talking about, let me tell you somethings about yours truly. I, have obviously not departed from this world, but if that black demon slithering through the grass had been poisonous things could have turned out differently.

Honestly this story is more of an adventure. In the end, you might actually digest some parts of this story, and remember it. The events that went down could have happened to anyone. Now for some information about myself. I am a twelve year old boy, at the time I was about nine. I love to be active I play basketball and run often. I am told I am a good writer, which I guess is for you to decide. What happened to me, I did not deserve, but I’m the end it all worked out. You will see. Doesn’t it always seem like bad things happen to the people who deserve to the least. It all started at my school with my friends…

3 years earlier

It was a beautiful day, the light from the sun reflected off the glossy surface of the pool. An area was set up in the back of my school for lunch. Chicken Kebab’s were lying outside on the schools grill looking abandoned, their odor wafting into the gazebo where I was at that moment. Next to the gazebo was a place laid out in the sun for us to eat. I was surrounded by my friends, mainly Yoni, Zach, and my brother Elior. They were all classmates of mine. We watched as our school dance troop performed on the perfectly trimmed lawn. The song they danced to was really weird, made up of unreal noises, that sounded like they predated dinosaurs. Yes, the song was old. The audience, including me, was getting bored. It was basically just them waving bandannas in the air while dancing in a circle. Now you might be asking why were we in back of our school instead of inside, exercising our brains. Two reasons, one it was Sunday and two it was our school’s fiftieth anniversary. You would expect my classmates and I to be awe-inspired and excited, but we were not. It just meant that at six or seven our impending fate would meet us, and we would be forced to sing songs, for the enjoyment of adults. I DID NOT WANT TO SING. My voice was terrible, and I hated how I sounded. Finally, the dancing finished and it was lunchtime. The lunch was luxurious, stupendous, and mind boggling. Afterwards, we ran around playing tag the only thing that excited me was that I would be able to see my friends later that night. Little did I know that would not be possible…

Let’s fast forward about an hour or two. I was in my backyard taking a swim with my family. It was a lot of fun. We were playing lots of games like Marco Polo. At the end, I got really mad, I forget why, but I left the pool.

That was probably one of the worst decisions of my life. You see, a moment later I stepped on a pinecone. Silly me, PINECONES DONT HAVE TEETH. That’s when my instincts kicked in. I was shaking my foot so hard that I thought it would fall off. Finally, the not-so-much of a pinecone wiggled off my foot. I walked over quickly to my mom, “I was just bitten by a snake,” I exclaimed! When you hear that from your fourth grade kid, you get a little worried. The first thought that struck was, is it poisonous. Since I actually hadn’t been looking at my victimizer, I wasn’t sure whether it was. We did the next thing that popped into our head immediately. 9-1-1. Have you ever had one of those experiences, where you are perfectly calm at the wrong time? That would be me. My question was, am I going to die.

I was quickly rushed to the emergency at a hospital called Shans. That hospital had all the anti venom treatments. The snake was probably a black racer, which aren’t poisonous, but you never know.

Honestly, I felt more bad for my mom than me. She gad to stay with me in the emergency room and miss the celebration. Her staying by my side really made me feel like I wasn’t alone in the dark. I was actually pretty calm, even though they had to put a huge needle in my shoulder. The first hour or two were actually fun. My mom, my brothers, and I played games and divulged in conversations to keep my mind off of the predicament. I started getting hungry, so my mom went and got some pizza and pasta.
Everyone says hospital food is terrible, but I kind of liked it. There was a room down the hallway that was stocked with gatorades. At anytime you could go down the hallway and get a gatorade. I had over ten gatorades. We watched a lot of tv in my room and I read a book. Every hour, a doctor would come and withdraw some more blood for analyzing. Around the third hour, my brothers had to leave to go sing. At this point you could really see where the snake had bit me. It was a black circle with two little fang sized holes in the,. At around eight, my mom went and got me chicken for dinner. We talked and said she would have rather been with me, then at the fiftieth. At eleven, they said I wasn’t poisoned and my mom and I walked through the big, double doors hand and hand. When I got to my house, I went to my room. Elior was asleep and him and Zach were smiling at me through a newly taken photo.

Two weeks later Zach and Elior were suspended for there conduct on the fiftieth.


Eighth Grade

Sleep-Away Camp by: Rachel L

One day, in the middle of the first session at camp Barney Medintz, everyone was worried about Lily. We worried and hoped all day that she was fine.  Being at sleep-away camp is hard, but for Lily it was harder.  Nobody expected this to happen, especially Lily.

It was a hot summer day.  It felt like you could melt if you stood still for too long.  Cabin 27C was going to make a music video!  We headed to the A.V. room. The A.V. room had a green screen, cameras, and laptops. We decided to use a Taylor Swift song for the video.  We picked the song “22.”  We headed to the amphitheater with an A.V. counselor.

The amphitheater was made of stone. The seats and stairs were made of a tan stone.  I could hear the campers in arts and crafts.  There was a metal handrail leading to the bottom of the stairs.  There was a huge stage at the bottom.  Behind the stage I could see some campers swimming and kayaking in the lake. They could fit the whole camp there!

The cameraman told us to run down the stairs while he recorded us from the bottom.  We ran down the stairs; having fun.  Nothing happened when we reached the bottom.  Nobody knew what was going to happen in just moments.

The cameraman wanted to record us again.  We turned around to walk back up the stairs.  Lily tripped and fell forward toward the next step.  It felt like she fell in slow motion.  As if the world stopped for a moment.  She fell onto her arm, trying to break the fall.

Lily started sobbing. The counselors helped her up.  She was holding her wrist, and it was bending in the wrong place.  I stepped away giving her room.  I knew she would be fine, but at the mount it didn’t seem like that.  I prayed that she would be fine.  The counselors took her to the nurse.  They said to keep going but I was too worried about Lily.  Lily was taken to the hospital.  Camp was about two hours away from town.  Lily returned with a purple cast at dinner.

After dinner we headed back to our cabin.  Lily headed to the nurse.  She slept there that night.  We brought her clothes for the next day and a pair of pajamas.

Two days later, we had rock climbing.  Lily slept in the bunk with us the day after she broke her arm.  I barely got off the ground when it was my turn.  They asked Lily if she wanted to climb she said yes.  Lily, with her broken arm, got higher than me.  Lily was a trooper even though she broke her arm.

My Trip To Wild Adventures by: Cayla C

I was waiting in the car with the wind coming through the open window. I was eight and I was going toWild Adventures with my mom, aunt, and sister. We were there, at the theme park jumping up and down with excitement. I was the happiest kid alive once we got into the park. We went on the Shoe Ride first.

Then we made our way down to the twisty roller coaster. I remembered getting off a ride that spun so much that I had that tickling feeling in my stomach. I felt like throwing up. I was just so excited to go on the next ride, so I took the quickest path to get there, the mulch. The next thing I knew, I was screaming.

Now this wasn’t just one of those “OMG, IT’S A BUG!” type of screams. This was one of those screams you hear when a monster shows up in the movies. My mom started to freak out, so she picked me up and hurried me to the aid center. At the center the doctor found that a toothpick went straight into my old thin crocks and right into my foot. He pulled it out of my foot and I screamed a bit. It was painful!

He quickly gave me a piece of candy. I was fine after, but still wheezing a bit after he pulled the pick out. The next day I left Wild Adventures to go back home. I was sad, but happy to get home. I fell asleep in the car then woke up to my surprise that I was at the doctor.

I had to get a shot so no bacteria infected me from the old, dirty, used toothpick that used to be hanging out of my foot. They called me in and I got the shot. I never liked shots so looked away as they gave me a tight pinch, which was actually the needle. I then left the doctor and headed home. Next thing I knew was that I finally was home and said goodbye to my aunt who was flying back to California that day.

I went to my room and fell on my bed and took a long nap It was a pretty long weekend I thought to myself, but thank god it was over.


This entry was posted in 6th grade, 7th grade, 8th grade, narrative writing. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Noteworthy Narratives

  1. Shereen Canady says:

    Great job Cayla! You added some good details, I could feel your pain.


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